My Kids Won’t Listen to Me: What to Do?

20 Oct 2016 | Learning, Listening

Do you feel like your kids just won’t listen to you?

Don’t worry – you are not alone.

Parents all over the world face the same challenge.

We’ve broken down 4 basic tips you can use immediately to encourage your kids to listen to you.

Read on to find out what they are.

1. Look at the appropriateness of situations.

Maybe you gave your child a long lecture right after a mistake. Or you asked them to do something else while they were in the midst of playing.

In situations like the above, most of the times they likely won’t listen to you.

When a child is angered, it probably isn’t the best time to reason with them about what supposedly is the “right attitude”.

In addition, giving a long lecture right after a mistake has just been committed can impact negatively on a child’s confidence.

WHAT TO DO? Try to hold it in and create a comfortable and conducive situation. Ease their anger and save the long lecture for later. The child will be more likely to listen better.

2. Control your way of speaking and intonation.

Sometimes, words are not the issues – but our choice of words and intonation.

Avoid words that imply judgement or punishment. If a child broke an object or teases his sister into tears, start with “What happened?” “How did it happen” instead of “What did I tell you?” or “You always do this!”

WHAT TO DO? Instead of reprimanding the child right away, give the child a chance to speak. The child will be aware and admit their mistake, and will be more willing to listen to you.

3. Pay attention to their positions and expressions.

article-whisperingPay attention to how we position ourselves to in relation to our child, as well as our facial expression when we speak.

When we’re within closer proximity, we don’t have to shout – especially because shouting won’t get their attention.

WHAT TO DO? Always try to position our face as close to or at the same level or height as our child’s as possible. Lean your body forward and avoid speaking while doing something else, whenever possible. These conditions are very important to get them to listen.

4. Build closer relationship and be a role model.

Have we ever wondered why sometimes our children listen to their teachers more so than to us?

It’s because most times, teachers make conscious efforts to build relationship with their young charges. Children will feel close if they also hear praises, receive support and help instead of lectures all day.

WHAT TO DO? Build a closer relationship with your child. Be their role model and listen wholeheartedly to them. Demonstrate your willingness to listen by practicing it daily with other people, especially with your spouse.

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